Cheeriosity
by mykindofparty
Summary: Sue Sylvester didn't become the biggest name in the dance world by going easy on her students, but now that some of her former stars have enrolled their kids in her class, the s***'s about to hit the fan. Brittana, St. Fabray, Samcedes.
1. Chapter 1

**Cheeriosity  
Characters/Pairings:** Sue, Brittany/Santana, Sugar, Quinn/Jesse, Beth, Rachel, Harmony, Mercedes/Sam, Aphasia, Kurt, Rory  
**Summary:** Sue Sylvester didn't become the biggest name in the dance world by going easy on her students, but now that some of her former stars have enrolled their kids in her class, the shit's about to hit the fan.  
**A/N:** Molly watches too much _Dance Moms_. So she made me write this.

* * *

"5, 6, 7, 8," Sue counts, snapping with the rhythm. To the untrained eye, this routine was perfect. But Sue knew better. "Stop! Dammit, Rory, by your age your father was already playing Billy Elliot. On _Broadway._ You have half of his DNA so you'd think you would've at least inherited _some_ of his talent!"

"I'm sorry," an eleven year old Rory apologizes. "I just get mixed up when–"

"I'm going to stop you right there," Sue bellows. "You know how your father got where he is today? It's because of me. All the talent in the world means nothing if you don't know the right people."

On the other side of the glass window, Kurt Hummel fumes. Since parents are forbidden from sitting in on rehearsal, he can only watch from afar as his son is berated by his former instructor. "He wasn't off by more than half a beat," Kurt says.

"Face it. Your kid sucks," Santana Lopez taunts from the row behind him. Kurt glares at her, but she only shrugs.

"You're lazier than your mother!" Sue shouts at Aphasia.

Mercedes Jones stands up. "Oh hell no!"

"Relax," Santana says. Mercedes is her best friend when it comes to the other dance moms, but even they don't always see eye to eye.

"And you! Don't take after _your_ mother," Sue tells Beth, "otherwise I'll be teaching a third generation of inbreds. I mean Fabrays."

Quinn Fabray stops reading her book. "I can't believe she's still allowed to teach children."

"So why do you keep Beth in lessons if you hate Sue so much?" Santana asks.

Quinn glances over at Rachel Berry, who is watching her daughter closely. "My husband thinks it builds character," she lies, but the real reason is sitting two seats to her left.

"And how is Jesse?" Santana says, feigning interest. "God, we haven't seen him in ages. Are you two having trouble?"

"Mind your own business," Rachel snaps, defending Quinn. Being a divorcee herself, Rachel had long suspected Quinn and Jesse were having marital problems.

"Mona," Sue says, addressing Harmony. "I don't care how great you think your voice is; _do not sing along with the music_."

Rachel scoffs at Sue's comment. "That was just uncalled for."

"No it wasn't," Santana replies breezily.

"Last but not least," Sue says, rounding on Sugar, who tries to hide her phone behind her back. "There is _no sexting_ in my dance rehearsal, you hear me?"

"What's sexting?" Sugar asks. She's only ten after all.

Sue yanks the cell phone from the girl's hand and throws it against the wall, causing it to shatter into at least four different pieces. "Which one of your mothers did you stumble out of?" she demands.

"My mama," Sugar says. "Brittany," she clarifies.

"I should've known. No wonder I hate you so much," Sue spits.

Now it's Santana's turn to be enraged. "That bitch!" she roars. The other moms and Kurt try to calm her down to no avail. She's livid. "Nobody insults my family!"

Sue has always disliked her wife since the time they were fourteen years old and Brittany danced with Cheeriosity's rival company. Sue still can't stand the sight of her, which is why Santana is forced to sit through many a practice on her own and why she chooses to pick on the other parents.

By the end of the rehearsal, Sue's at her wit's end. "Ladies," she says to the class, ignoring Rory's confused look, "that was the most pathetic excuse for dancing I've ever seen. And I've given Sugar private lessons for years!"

Kurt laughs, but stops short once he realizes once Sue's said. "Wait – you're paying for private lessons?" he asks Santana. "How'd you get Sue to agree to that?"

"Don't have a hissy fit 'cause I thought of it first," Santana replies coolly. "All I had to do was flash my checkbook at her."

"Well, if Sugar's getting privates, then so should Harmony since she's the star of the group," Rachel says. "How much do you pay, Santana?"

Santana crosses her arms. "I'm not sure a single mother such as yourself could afford it."

"I can't believe you kept this from me. We could've at least gone halfsies!" Mercedes says.

"Listen, I want your kid to succeed and all that jazz, but I had an opportunity to give Sugar the edge so I took it," Santana says. "You can't blame me for that."

"Santana, Sugar's still the worst in the group," Quinn points out.

Kurt nods in agreement. "Face it, your kid sucks," he says, repeating Santana's words from earlier.

"None of them compare to Harmony so I don't know why we're even having this conversation," Rachel says. "Beth's as close as they come…"

"Thank you," says Quinn.

"…and even she's a distant second."

Quinn frowns.

Sue chooses that moment to barge in the door. "Take your kids and get the hell out of my studio. All of you. I don't want to see them until we leave for Chicago on Saturday morning."

Rachel, who never took lessons from Sue as a child, says, "So that was the last rehearsal before the competition? It's only Thursday."

Sue gives her a once over. "Do I know her?" she asks Quinn, who nods.

"I'm Harmony's mom–" Rachel begins.

Although Harmony's been taking lessons for three years, Sue seems suspicious. "I never taught you."

"Sue, we've had dozens of conversations–"

"I don't trust people I didn't teach," Sue growls. "Hell, I don't trust people I have taught! Take that traitor, for example." She points to Santana.

"It's been twenty years since I met Brittany. _Get over it_," Santana argues.

Sue puts her foot down. "I will do no such thing! Okay, Harley's mom, you want another practice? You got it. Four o'clock tomorrow."

Everyone except Rachel groans. "Fantastic!" she says. She pulls Quinn to the side. "Hey, do you think you can give Harmony a ride tomorrow?"

"Sure," a reluctant Quinn says.

"Great! I'll drop her off on my way to work," Rachel says, running her hand down Quinn's arm. "Oh, you don't mind if she also spends the night, do you?"

"No," Quinn stammers. "No, it's totally fine." She's about to extend the invitation to Rachel as well, but she disappears before Quinn can even begin to form the words.

In the dance studio, Santana hands Sugar her winter coat. "Bundle up, Sugar Britches."

"Mami, why do we have practice tomorrow? I wanted to go to the mall," Sugar whines.

Santana kneels down so that she's at eye level with her daughter. "Sugar, baby, you know how Mama always gets upset whenever I spoil you?"

"Yeah, 'cause she makes you sleep on the couch," Sugar says loudly. The other parents snicker to themselves.

"Exactly. If you do better than Harmony Berry this weekend, I'll take you shopping when we get back. And I will buy you a new damn – excuse me, _darn_ – wardrobe. Even if it means I have to sleep on the couch for a whole week," Santana promises.

She holds out her pinkie, which Sugar links with her own. "I'm gonna want a new cell phone, too," Sugar bargains before letting go.

"Aphasia, time to leave," Mercedes calls to her daughter.

"Where's Mister Evans?" Aphasia says, placing one hand on her hip.

"Your stepfather is waiting for us at home and for the last time, he told you to call him Sam," Mercedes scolds.

"I don't have to do what he says. He ain't my daddy."

Mercedes sighs. "I need a Valium."

"Dad?" Rory says, approaching his father. "I don't know if I'm cut out to be a dancer."

Kurt rubs his temples. "Just give it a chance," he begs. "You like hanging out with the girls in your class, don't you?"

Rory blushes, glancing over at Sugar. "They're okay," he says, trying to appear disinterested. "For girls."

"Dinner, homework, vocal exercises, bed," Rachel recites to her daughter.

Harmony perks up. "I'm already done with my homework. Can I watch TV instead?"

"Only for thirty minutes. Then you can brush Mommy's hair," Rachel smiles.

Harmony claps.

Out in the hallway, Quinn waves to Mercedes and Santana while she waits for Beth to finish tying her shoes. "What do you wanna do tonight?" she asks.

"I could brush your hair," Beth jokes, and they share a laugh until she gets a serious look on her face. "Daddy's not coming home again, is he?"

Quinn kisses her forehead. "I don't think so, baby."

Beth shrugs. "Pizza and ice cream?" she suggests hopefully.

"Sounds good to me, kiddo."


	2. Chapter 2

**Cheeriosity  
Characters/Pairings:** Sue, Brittany/Santana, Sugar, Quinn/Jesse, Beth, Rachel, Harmony, Mercedes/Sam, Aphasia, Kurt, Rory  
**Summary:** Sue Sylvester didn't become the biggest name in the dance world by going easy on her students, but now that some of her former stars have enrolled their kids in her class, the shit's about to hit the fan.  
**A/N:** I have ADD or something because this is totally not what I was going to work on next.

* * *

It's the morning of the competition and the group should've left thirty minutes ago, yet Rachel is nowhere to be found so all they can do is wait – which has never been one of Sugar's strong suits.

"Can't you ride with me?" Sugar pleads with her mama in the studio parking lot.

"Sorry, sweet pea; Coach Sue won't let me step foot on that bus. She threatened to shoot me out of a cannon if I did," Brittany tells her. She's used to Sugar's endless barrage of questions, but that doesn't stop her from wishing Rachel would hurry up. "I'll still see you compete, Sug. I wouldn't miss it for the world. I just have to drive myself there."

"But Mami _always_ falls asleep and I _always_ get stuck by the window."

"That's because we're always – uh, I mean – _she's_ always up late the night before… packing our suitcases."

"If you had at least bought me that iPod like I asked, I wouldn't have to listen to her snore all the way to Chicago."

Brittany considers it for a moment. Her wife has a tendency to spoil their daughter, but she will absolutely not cave in… yet. "Maybe for your birthday, but for now you're just going to have to deal with the snoring."

"But my birthday's three months away! That's…" Sugar counts in her head. "At least six more competitions!"

"Fine," Brittany says. "If your solo routine places in the top three, I'll get you that iPod. But under no circumstances can you tell Mami."

Sugar holds out her pinkie finger. "Make it an iPad and you've got yourself a deal."

On the other side of the parking lot, Aphasia is about to have a meltdown. "Why I gotta share a hotel room with _him_?" she says about her stepfather, Sam. "If people see us together, they gonna think he kidnapped me. It's happened before."

"Because you were screaming, _He's kidnappin' me! He's kidnappin' me!_" Mercedes recounts, flailing her arms. "Then _I _had to explain to the police that it was just a misunderstanding."

"They should've gone all SVU on his ass," Aphasia sulks.

"Look, Sam's part of our family now whether you like it or not, but I won't force you to share a room with him. That's why I booked y'all a suite. Give him a chance, Aphasia. He would never do anything to hurt you."

Aphasia glances over her shoulder where Sam is chatting with her Auntie Tana. "Fine, but you let _him_ know that this ain't no video game. He only gets one chance."

"Always waiting on Rachel," Santana murmurs. She has one hand in her pocket while the other holds her morning cigarette. "Y'know, for a fucking perfectionist, you'd think she'd be here before any of us."

Sam shivers. "At least Harmony's here. If we leave now, we'll still have time to eat before we check in for the competition."

"But then Rachel will have to ride in Brittany's car," Santana says.

"What's wrong with that?"

Santana snorts. "Are you kidding me? Brittany hates that woman even more than I do."

Before she can go into greater detail, Sugar tugs at her sleeve. "I want coffee."

"You know the rules. No coffee until just before you go on stage," Santana reminds her. "If you drink some now, you'll crash before we even get to Cook County."

"What if I get a Dunkaccino from over there? It's half coffee, half hot chocolate," Sugar says, pointing to the Dunkin Donuts across the street.

"That sounds disgusting. Get me one too," Santana says as she hands her daughter a twenty dollar bill. "Use the crosswalk and take a buddy." Then she adds, "And Sugar Britches? I want my change."

Sugar shrugs. "I make no promises," she says sassily before prancing off to find Rory.

"Can I ask you something?" Sam asks Santana and she can tell just from the troubled look on his face where this conversation is headed. "She…" He struggles to voice his concern. "She doesn't hold it against you that you didn't… you know… give birth to her, does she?"

"I am and always have been Sugar's Mami," Santana says. "And just because you're not Aphasia's father doesn't mean you can't be a good parent to her. Personally, I think you should just lay down the law."

"Like you do with Sugar?" Sam jokes.

Santana flicks her cigarette butt at him.

"Did you put your bags on the bus, kiddo?" Quinn asks, placing her hand on Beth's shoulder. She quickly retracts it when she sees her daughter is on the phone.

"Sorry," Beth apologizes once she hangs up, "Daddy was telling me to break a leg."

"Oh, it's fine," Quinn recovers. "You haven't seen Rachel – I mean, Ms. Berry yet, have you?"

"No, but Harmony says she doesn't get home some mornings until right before school."

For a moment, Quinn's heart stops. "So Harmony's home alone those nights?"

"Her grandpas always come over. They just couldn't watch her last night," Beth explains.

"Good," Quinn breathes out. "That's good."

"Any sign of your mom yet, Melody?" Sue barks at Harmony.

"She'll be here," Harmony says unconvincingly.

Sue squints. "In the meantime, entertain me."

"Okay!" Harmony agrees. "Would you like me to sing or dance? Or both?"

"None of the above," Sue says. "I want you to gnaw on this comically large carrot like Bugs Bunny."

Harmony's eyes light up at the suggestion. "An acting exercise! Why didn't I think of that?" She slips into character. _"What's up, doc?"_

Sue smiles in spite of herself. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Less yappin' and more snappin'."

Thirty more minutes pass and there's still no sign of Rachel.

"We need to get going," Sue announces to the group. "Everybody on the bus."

Although she tries not to show it, Harmony's starting to panic when Quinn steps in to comfort her.

"She's never this late," Harmony says as tears begin to form in her eyes.

Quinn only holds her tighter. "Maybe they really needed her at work."

"Maybe," Harmony whispers, "but I need her _more_."

Santana watches as Quinn leads Harmony onto the bus and she pulls her wife aside. "It pains me to do this, Britt, but I think you need to wait here for Rachel."

To her surprise, Brittany nods. "It's a long trip alone, anyway." She kisses her wife and daughter goodbye. "See you in the Windy City."


	3. Chapter 3

**Cheeriosity  
Characters/Pairings:** Sue, Brittany/Santana, Sugar, Quinn/Jesse, Beth, Rachel, Harmony, Mercedes/Sam, Aphasia, Kurt, Rory  
**Summary:** Sue Sylvester didn't become the biggest name in the dance world by going easy on her students, but now that some of her former stars have enrolled their kids in her class, the shit's about to hit the fan.  
**A/N:** Where is Rachel? Your guess is as good as mine.

* * *

Harmony Berry stares out the window of the Chicago-bound bus as it rolls through the Ohio countryside. Mrs. St. James, or Quinn as she insists Harmony call her, hasn't once let go of her hand even though their palms are starting to sweat.

And Quinn's great, but Harmony really, really wants her mother.

Her mother who works sixty hour weeks because _Cheeriosity_ isn't cheap and there's a stack of bills on their counter that gets taller every day; who went back to school for a second degree; who only allows thirty minutes of television a night; who taught Harmony everything she knows about the theatre.

"Did you want to try calling her again? Maybe a text?" Quinn asks soothingly.

Harmony shakes her head no. "Her voicemail's full and she only has 200 texts a month."

Quinn pats her hand and Harmony thinks that for now it'll have to do.

"How's it goin' over there, AJ?" Sam calls across the aisle. He's sprawled out across the backseat and using his bookbag for a pillow while his stepdaughter tries her best to avoid him.

"AJ's a _boy's_ name, Mister Evans," she finally says, narrowing her eyes.

"I dunno," he shrugs. "Could go either way. Like Sam… which you can call me."

"Or I could call you White Chocolate. That was your stage name, right?"

He grins sheepishly. "Uh, yeah. From the play I was in when I met your mom."

Aphasia's not stupid, though. She knows 'the play' is really code for Stallionz, the strip club her mother used to frequent.

The truth is just too humiliating.

For all three of them.

"Hi, I saw on your website that you sell De – DeLo – cars that work as time machines," Sugar whispers into Santana's cell phone while its owner snores, blissfully unaware of what's taking place. Sugar rolls her eyes. This isn't the first time she's 'borrowed' a credit card to buy something, but it was _way_ easier when she had her own phone. "How far back can you go?"

"_To avoid confusion and potential wormholes we can only send you as far back as the first _Back to the Future_ movie," _the operator says.

"So, like… 1895?" Sugar guesses. Math's never been her best subject, but she's pretty sure that _Gone with the Wind_ is basically the oldest movie in the world and that took place during the Civic War.

Okay, so maybe history's not her best subject either.

"_Try 1985. And because of backorders, you'll have to wait six years for your machine."_

Sugar shrugs it off. "No biggie." At least she won't have to hide a car from her mothers. Besides, six years will give her plenty of time to learn how to drive. "Does the price include S and H?"

"_No ma'am, shipping and handling is an additional cost. The warranty is also extra –"_

"Can I pay for it now or not?" Sugar says bluntly. Her patience is wearing thin because Coach Sue sometimes drives over potholes just for the heck of it and she needs to finish this call before a certain someone wakes up.

The operator sighs. _"We take all major credit cards except American Express."_

Sugar looks through her Mami's wallet. "It's cool. I have like, ten others anyway."

"I don't know why you're so worried, Daddy," Rory says as his father shows him videos of past routines.

"Look, I didn't want to make you nervous, but there will be some major casting directors at the competition. If they like you, maybe you'll get to be on Broadway!" Kurt tells him.

Rory scratches his head. "Will that impress girls?"

"How should I know?" Kurt pauses. "Anyway, just promise me you'll try."

Nodding, Rory presses play on the portable dvd player and lets his eyes glaze over while he thinks about Sugar's smile instead.

"I saw it at Radio Shack, Grandma, and I just knew you had to buy it for me," Sugar says. "My birthday's still a few months away, but I was hoping you'd it get now and then forget about it and then buy me another present when the time comes."

"_What does a girl your age need with a laptop?"_ Grandma Pierce asks. _"Your mama had one in high school and she mostly used it to look up pornog– puppies,"_ she catches herself, not that her granddaughter notices.

"All my friends have them! Except Harmony."

"_I still think you're too young, Sweet Pea. Maybe in a few years."_

Sugar bites her lip. "Is Grandpa around? Just put the phone next to his part-deaf ear and I'll do the rest."

Then the signal cut out or something because her grandma wasn't on the other line anymore – which is weird because the bus wasn't passing under a bridge or anything.

Must've lost service on the other end.

"Want to play a game?" Sam asks.

"Okay," Aphasia agrees. This ride can't possibly get more boring.

Sam opens his backpack, which is filled with at least a dozen cartridges and handheld gaming systems. "I have PSP, Nintendo DS, Game Boy Advance, Game Boy Color, Game Boy Pocket, and the crown jewel in my collection, the original Game Boy. Bet you've never seen one of these before."

"Maybe in a museum," Aphasia retorts. She browses through the pack, looking for anything she might recognize. After a few minutes of searching, she pulls one out at random. "Is this any fun?"

"Pokémon Yellow? It's only the best game ever!" he says excitedly. "Here – I'll show you how it starts. I also brought my link cable in case you wanna trade any later on. Gotta catch 'em all, right?"

Aphasia groans.

"Don't think about how bad you gotta pee, Sue, it's a weakness and you are NOT weak," Sue mutters to herself. "We're already behind schedule. There's no time for… well, we are running low on gas."

Harmony sits up. "Why are we pulling off the exit?" she wonders aloud. Is it possible that her mother will be waiting there? Did Sugar's mama really find her and catch up to the bus that quickly?

"You got ten minutes while I empty my tank and refuel the bus," Sue shouts.

The sound of Sue's voice jolts Santana out of her sleep. Disoriented, she looks over to her daughter who is chatting on _her_ phone.

"So you sell deep dish pizzas? I've always wanted to try one. Can you send it to my hotel later this evening?" Sugar says. "We're staying at…"

"I'll take that," Santana says, snatching the phone out of her daughter's hand. "Please tell me you only ordered a pizza this time."

But before Sugar can respond, Santana gets a text message from her wife.

It reads _Got her_.


	4. Chapter 4

**Cheeriosity  
Characters/Pairings:** Sue, Brittany/Santana, Sugar, Quinn/Jesse, Beth, Rachel, Harmony, Mercedes/Sam, Aphasia, Kurt, Rory  
**Summary:** Sue Sylvester didn't become the biggest name in the dance world by going easy on her students, but now that some of her former stars have enrolled their kids in her class, the shit's about to hit the fan.  
**A/N:** Part 4.

* * *

"So…" Brittany begins, unsure of what to say, "You look like crap."

It's the truth, really. Rachel's never been particularly attractive in Brittany's mind, but with her unkempt hair and glasses, she looks like another person entirely. A crappy-looking person. She doesn't smell much better either.

"Didn't have time to shower after work," Rachel says breathlessly. "C'mon, we gotta go, we gotta catch up!"

"The bus is halfway to Chicago by now. What's another twenty minutes?" Brittany replies.

"Fine," Rachel huffs, "we'll stop by my house, but you're staying in the car."

For once, Brittany agrees.

…

Meanwhile on the bus, Quinn and Santana discuss the latest development.

"I hope they make it in time," Quinn says.

"They will."

"H-how can you be so sure?"

Santana winks at Quinn while scrolling through the contacts on her phone. Her wife's never missed a competition and she'll be damned if today is any exception. "Sugar Britches isn't the only one who knows how to get things," she boasts. "I have a few… _acquaintances_ on the police force who owe me some favors."

"And by acquaintances you mean dirty cops and by favors you mean money," Quinn fills in the blanks. "Let me guess, they're just gonna let Brittany off with a warning if they catch her speeding?"

"Like they'd even stop her in the first place," says Santana with a laugh. As the most powerful drug lord in Ohio, she has some _major_ pull. "But seriously, let me use your phone. Mine's been tapped."

"Cool, Aphasia, you're really getting the hang of it!" Sam cheers as he looks over his stepdaughter's shoulder.

"What are you talkin' about? This Pikachu's a pika-_pussy_. He died four times," she says, eyes glued to the screen. "Make that five times."

Sam chuckles. "He just fainted. Have you caught any other Pokémon? Generation 1 is totally the best because–"

"Sam," Aphasia interrupts, "if you keep watching me like that, Pikachu won't be the only one that faints."

…

"New York!" Rachel shouts. She and Brittany have been playing the license plate game for about ten minutes now and she is _so_ winning… mostly because Brittany's not really playing. "6 down, 44 to go."

"Wouldn't you rather take a nap?" Brittany asks, praying that the answer is yes.

Rachel gazes out the window, looking far off into the distance. She thinks about how disappointed Harmony must feel. "I was dead on my feet around four this morning," she reveals. "A friend offered to drive me home, but..."

…

"She probably didn't recognize Quinn's number. That's why she forgot to call me back, right?" Harmony asks Sugar. "I know she's on her way, but I deserve a call, even if I don't have my own cell phone."

Sugar pats her hand. "I feel your pain. I'm between phones right now and it's like I don't even know what to do with myself! I'm a _mess_. I'm crying on the inside way harder than you're crying on the outside."

"Traditional Irish stepdance," Kurt says, lecturing Rory on the finer points of performance, "wins 'em over every time. Just don't mix up your hornpipes and treble jigs."

Rory frowns. "Which is which again?"

…

"Wow," is all Brittany can say when Rachel finishes her story.

"Yeah," Rachel agrees. "So what is it that you do? I know Santana's the largest distributor of baked goods in Ohio, right?"

"Something like that," Brittany answers. "I work from home."

Rachel blinks. "That's all I get? I just _told_ you my life saga!" she exclaims.

"I work from home… on the computer?"

"Now you're just doing that on purpose," says Rachel.

Brittany sighs. She's never had to spend this much time with Rachel before and frankly, it's exhausting. She's not sure how Santana is able to sit through rehearsals without popping a cap in Rachel's ass. "Look, all I want is to be on that bus with my wife while my kid orders Space Goo over the phone," Brittany says. "But I can't because I didn't dance for Sue Sylvester. You know what? _Neither did you._ And you get to ride the bus with your daughter and I don't. What makes you special?"

"Brittany, I–"

"You should've seen the look on Harmony's face," Brittany continues, gripping the steering wheel so tightly that her knuckles turn white. "Never saw a more disappointed kid in my life."

…

Santana combs through Sugar's hair with her fingers as the bus comes to a stop outside the convention center. "Remember what I told you, sweet pea?"

Sugar nods. "Always keep the Feds off my trail and the wax out of my ears."

"Although you can never be too careful when it comes to wax buildup, I was actually talking about our little bet," says Santana.

"Oh yeah," Sugar says. She racks her brain, trying to remember which deal she had with her Mami. "Don't worry, I'm sure I'll place in the top three."

Confused, Santana replies, "As long as Harmony gets fourth, I guess."

Sugar kisses her cheek. "Gotta go sign in. Love you!"

"Put a little pep in your step, kids!" Sue yells across the crowded lobby. She pushes a small child aside. "Coming through."

"Is there a prize for the peppiest?" Harmony asks excitedly. Her mother may not be in Chicago just yet, but she'll still arrive in time to see her perform. That's all that matters.

Sugar giggles into Rory's shoulder. "My mami puts pep in her brownies all the time, but she says I can't try one until college," she whispers.

Sue clears her throat and gives her students a devilish smirk. "Ladies, let the games begin."


	5. Chapter 5

**Cheeriosity  
Characters/Pairings:** Sue, Brittany/Santana, Sugar, Quinn/Jesse, Beth, Rachel, Harmony, Mercedes/Sam, Aphasia, Kurt, Rory  
**Summary:** Sue Sylvester didn't become the biggest name in the dance world by going easy on her students, but now that some of her former stars have enrolled their kids in her class, the shit's about to hit the fan.  
**A/N:** Part 5!

* * *

Sue walks past her students in the dressing room, inspecting them as she goes. "More hairspray," she tells Sugar. "Easy on the eyeliner," she says to Rory. "Aphasia, looking as sharp as that knife in your pocket."

"What?" Aphasia asks when all of the parents turn to look at her. "We're in_ Chicago_. Plus Sam's always telling me to be prepared!"

"That's for like… camping," Sam says sheepishly.

"You're so lucky," Sugar tells Rory at their shared mirror. She watches closely as Santana puts the finishing touches on her hair.

"Why's that?" he asks.

Sugar sighs. "You have, like, _zero_ competition."

Rory's heart starts to race. "I do?"

"Yeah, there are always way less boys than girls at these things."

"Oh," Rory says disappointedly as Sugar leaves to go get her first costume. "I thought maybe you meant… never mind."

Santana glares at him. "I see you've got a little crush on my daughter. And why wouldn't you? She's the most precious child this world has ever seen and I'll go to the ends of the earth to make sure she is happy, but there is one thing I'll never agree to. My daughter is not allowed to date; not now, not _ever_. Just because you two have known each other since birth does not mean you will be the exception to that rule. Understand?"

Rory nods.

There's a knock on the door and Sue opens it. "WE DON'T GO ON FOR ANOTHER 45," she bellows at the man outside.

"A-Actually, I have a delivery for a… Beth?" he stutters, handing Sue a bouquet of roses.

Beth steps forward to get the flowers from Sue.

"Do you have a secret admirer I don't know about?" Quinn asks her daughter.

Beth reads the card that goes along with it. "They're from Daddy," she says quietly.

"That was nice of him," Quinn whispers.

"I just wish he was here."

"Who says I'm not?" Jesse replies, making his way into the dressing room.

"Daddy!" Beth screams.

"Hey, kiddo!" he lifts her up into the air and swirls her around. "I've missed you." He looks over at his estranged wife. "Both of you."

A pang of guilt hits Quinn when she remembers her growing feelings towards Rachel, but she pushes it aside because she really _has_ missed Jesse.

And for once, it doesn't feel like there's any bad blood between them.

A fully-costumed Sugar tugs on Santana's sleeve. "Where are _my_ flowers?" she asks.

Santana frowns. "I'm waiting until after the competition to give them to you… of course."

"Oh," Sugar says happily. "Okay!"

Santana waits until Sugar is halfway across the room again before she pulls out her phone and dials 411.

"Want more glitter, AJ?" Sam asks Aphasia, who shakes her head no. "Good idea. That stuff always got stuck in my butt crack."

It's at that moment Aphasia starts to think that maybe having a stripper for a stepfather isn't so bad after all.

Ten minutes before Cheeriosity's group performance time, Sue herds the parents out of the room to give the girls and Rory her traditional pep talk.

Santana listens on the other side of the door since Sue always singles Sugar out for some reason or another.

"Splenda, this is important," Sue says. "Pay attention."

Sugar perks up when she hears the word pay. Sue must be talking about money. "Just have my moms write you a check," she shrugs, not really caring what Sue has to say.

A light bulb goes off in Santana's head.

Maybe there is a way Sugar can win without even trying.

Outside in the parking lot, Rachel and Brittany climb out of the car after their long journey. Thankfully they're able to park right next to the door––due to Santana's "connections" with the local law enforcement––and slip inside with a few minutes to spare.

"Brittany Susan Pierce? It is you. I thought I recognized your donkey behind," someone calls once the two women enter the lobby.

"Coach Roz!" Brittany replies, giving her a hug. Although they stay in contact, it's been a while since Brittany's seen her former instructor. "How are things at Olympic Dance?"

"Girl, my bronze medal in individual synchronized swimming _still_ brings in new clients left and right," Roz brags.

Brittany sighs. "Sometimes I wish Sugar danced for you instead, but Santana would never allow it."

"Please tell me your wife is not still scared of that time Sue Sylvester's raggedy ass caught y'all making out backstage. You were kids back then!"

"God, I know it was a long time ago, but the way she yanked me by the ear scarred me for _life_," Santana says, joining the conversation. "I can't wear hoop earrings without worrying one is hanging significantly lower than the other."

"Santana Lopez," Coach Roz says. "Sue spends her time intimidating ten year olds into pissing their pants. You are the leader of a drug cartel."

"Allegedly," Santana says.

"What?"

"I'm _allegedly _the leader of a drug cartel."

Brittany kisses her wife on the cheek. "Hi."

"Hi," Santana blushes.

"Lord, some things never change," Roz says, rolling her eyes. She gives Brittany one more hug before adding, "I'll talk to you lovebirds later."

Brittany watches wistfully as her former coach and mentor leaves.

"I know what you're thinking," Santana whispers. "You're thinking we should switch dance studios."

"She's so much better with children. Besides, you conduct a lot of… _meetings_ here in Chicago," Brittany says.

"If I'm being honest, I would love to move back. This is where we met, where I proposed, and where we shared our first crappy apartment," Santana says. "But we have a life in Lima––no matter how many _meetings_ I have here."

Brittany smiles; she loves their life in Lima, but she wants to give her daughter all the best opportunities as well. "I just don't know if Sugar's private lessons are helping."

"Of course they're not!" Santana replies. "Sue's a terrible teacher. Besides, I think I found a better way to spend that money."

"Santana," Brittany asks, "what did you do?"

"Nothing," Santana smirks. "Okay––maybe I paid a visit to the judges."

"This means I'll have to get her an iPad," Brittany confesses.

Santana laughs. "Put me down for a shopping spree and a new cell phone. Also, do you think three dozen roses are too much or not enough?"

"You got her roses?"

"The roses are for you. She's getting carnations."

Brittany gives her wife a kiss on the lips. "C'mon, let's go watch Cheeriosity blow everyone else out of the water."

Santana frowns. "About that… I only had enough cash on me to ensure that Sugar will win the individual competition."


	6. Chapter 6

"Thank you for that… _stunning_ performance," the host of the competition, Sandy Ryerson, says. "I know my chills are multiplyin'. Now, let's give a round of a round of applause to all the contestants before we announce the winners of the group competition."

"And remember, tomorrow is individuals," his co-host, April Rhodes, adds.

"April, what's your individual talent?" Sandy asks.

"That would be lookin' sober, Sandy," she banters and the two laugh. April pauses. "I'm serious."

Sandy rolls his eyes. "Now, in third place… The Pristines coached by Emma Pillsbury!"

Sue claps half-heartedly as the Pristines take the stage to claim their trophy, catching Roz Washington's eye. Sue smirks at her rival. They're always neck and neck, but with Harmony as the lead soloist, Sue just knows she has it in the bag.

"Loser," Sue coughs in Roz's direction.

"And the second place prize goes to… _Cheeriosity_!"

"WHAT?" Sue roars. "I demand a recount!"

"There are no recounts," Sandy says into his microphone.

"Yikes," says Sam in the audience. He doesn't know much about the dance competition world, but he knows enough about Sue Sylvester that he's already afraid for that poor man's life.

"We lost?" Harmony says, starting to cry. She doesn't even join her teammates on stage as they collect their trophy. She's too upset and her mother comforts her quietly.

"Hey now," Rachel says, looking her daughter in the eyes. "It'll be okay. I'm here. Besides, you can always win tomorrow at individuals."

"No she can't," Santana whispers to Brittany with a smirk.

April sways over to where the girls and Rory of Cheeriosity are still on stage. "Okay, kids, time to announce the first place team. Which means scram."

"But where'd Coach Sue go?" Sugar asks, looking around.

Rory, who'd watched her the entire time, speaks up. "I saw her storm outside," he says. "She looked like demon possessed by Sue Sylvester."

As Cheeriosity shuffles off the stage, Kurt decides to follow Sue out the door.

"This is the moment we've all been waiting for," Sandy says. "The winners of the group competition. Can I get a drum roll please."

"No, but I got a drumstick stuffed down my bra," April says, pulling out a piece of chicken. "In case I get hungry later." She tucks it back in for safe keeping.

"That's your worst joke yet," Sandy says. "Seriously, why do I _always_ get paired up with you?"

"Just announce the winner for God's sake," Santana yells from her front row seat. She doesn't have time for this. Her kid's team already lost.

"Fine by me, bossy lady in the front row," April says, snatching the envelope out of Sandy's hand. "The winner is Olympic Dance coached by Roz Washington!"

Harmony sobs even harder.

The parents trail out of the auditorium and into the lobby disappointedly. For the most part, the girls and Rory don't seem to mind they placed second.

"I mean, did you even see Olympic perform? They were flawless," Rachel complains. "Even I had no critique."

"Yeah, I hate to admit it, but they were better," says Quinn, wrapping her arm around Rachel's waist and giving her half a hug.

Rachel leans into Quinn's side. "Well, if there's one thing I know it's that the sun'll come out tomorrow."

"Actually, it's supposed to rain," Santana says.

Just then, Kurt runs into the lobby from outside. "I trailed Sue to the parking lot," he reveals, slightly out of breath. "She took the bus with her and everything!"

"What?!" Sam asks. "Our luggage was on there!"

"Not anymore. It's in the parking lot now. I recognized Santana's Louis Vuitton suitcase. I think Sue backed over it."

Santana glowers. "That bitch is lucky my wife brought enough clothes to share with me otherwise I'd be P-I-S-S-E-D!"

"Okay, we all totally know what that spells," Sugar says, rolling her eyes.

"Santana," Quinn says, "don't you know a few people who could help us out?"

"I am _not_ putting a hit out on my daughter's dance teacher," Santana says so only Quinn can hear.

"What? No! Just have one of your cop buddies pull her over."

"That's not really necessary. Besides, I'm trying to keep a low profile. You wouldn't understand," Santana replies, looking over her shoulder.

"If we don't get Sue back, how are we supposed to compete tomorrow?" Rachel asks. "I mean… how are the _girls_ supposed to compete?"

"And Rory," Kurt adds.

"Let's just ask the girls. Even if we can't find Coach Sue in time, it should be their decision anyway," Brittany says wisely.

Kurt rolls his eyes. "The girls _and _Rory."

"I'm in," Sugar says, raising her hand. "There's a lot riding on this."

"I'm in, too," Harmony says to Sugar's annoyance. Rachel gives her daughter a high five.

"I'd be fine if I didn't dance tomorrow, but I think my daddy would be disappointed," Rory says. He sighs. "Count me in."

"Beth? What about–" Quinn starts to say before she's rudely interrupted by Jesse.

"Beth, sweetie. Don't you wanna spend some quality time with your old man? I'll take you to the zoo or maybe even a museum."

Beth looks back and forth between her parents. "Dad," she says, "I came here to dance."

Jesse nods sadly. "Okay, I get it."

"But…" Beth continues, "Maybe we can do something next weekend."

Quinn smiles as her daughter gives Jesse a hug.

"Aphasia?" Sam asks.

"Shit. I'd rather boo people on stage," Aphasia says. "Only if you'll join me, Sam."

"Okay!" he agrees happily. "I'll teach you all the best insults I heard as a stripper!"

"Then can you show me how to beat Misty? She's pretty tough for a girl wearin' suspenders," says Aphasia.

"Duh," Sam grins.

Roz Washington, followed by her Olympic Dancers, walks up to the group. "Seems to me like Sue abandoned ship. My name is Roz Washington," she introduces herself, handing out her card to each of the parents. "I coach these fine dancers behind me and I would love to coach your girls as well. My studio is here in Chicago, which is just a stone's throw away from Lima if you've got a good arm." She winks.

Rachel steps forward. "With all due respect, Ms. Washington, most of Sue's students are second generation Cheerios. Our girls – and Rory – aren't interested. Thank you for your time though."

Roz nods her head. "If any of you change your minds, give me call."

And with that, she's gone.

"There's just one more problem," Santana says. "How are we all getting to the hotel? Our SUV seats six, but we'd have to make a few trips since Kurt's hair products take up the whole car."

"Ha ha," Kurt retorts. "Very funny."

Santana shrugs.

"I have my car," Jesse volunteers. "Quinn and Beth can ride with me. I can squeeze one more in, too."

"That still leaves two people," Kurt says. "Which I'm guessing is me and my son since we always seem to get neglected."

"Actually," Rachel says, "Harmony and I aren't staying at the same hotel… so we can just catch a cab. I went to the Coinstar this morning."

"You aren't staying in the same hotel as me – I mean, us? The rest of us?" Quinn asks.

Rachel looks at the ground. "It's a little out of our price range."

"You can stay with us," Quinn offers. "Beth and I would enjoy the company."

"What about me?" Jesse asks.

"You can crash with me, man. Aphasia has her own room, but I think there's a pullout couch," Sam says. Jesse shrugs. "It'll be like boys night!"

"I hope boys night includes the Hummels," Kurt says sarcastically.

"Everybody quit your whining," Santana says, taking charge. "Let's get to the hotel, check in, eat some dinner, and after you've all stuffed your faces, we'll have a parent's meeting to discuss what's going to happen after this weekend."


	7. Chapter 7

Back at the hotel, the kids gather in Aphasia's suite while their parents meet downstairs.

"What do you think they'll decide?" Rory asks worriedly. Worst case scenario, his father will decide one thing and Sugar's moms will decide another, separating him from his crush.

Beth's not entirely sure why her mother looks as Ms. Berry that way, but she does know it's different than the way she looks at Beth's father. She looks over at Harmony. "My mom will just agree with your mom."

"I don't want to leave Lima. I'd miss my friends," Harmony reasons.

"You have friends besides us?" Sugar asks her, but doesn't wait for a reply. "Anyway, I vote Chicago so I don't have to exclusively shop online. Plus with my perfect credit score we could all share an apartment of our own."

Aphasia's adaptable; she'll be fine anywhere she goes. It's Sam she's worried about. In her mind, stripping is an addiction that he could easily fall back into if they move here. "This place ain't all it's cracked up to be," she says.

"I'm not above blackmailing my moms into bribing you," Sugar warns.

"Everyone in favor of staying in Lima, raise your hand," Harmony says.

Three hands go up immediately.

Rory counts them. "Looks like we're outnumbered, Sug."

"_Un-freaking-believable_," Sugar mutters under her breath.

Downstairs in the hotel bar, the adults are having a difficult time accomplishing anything.

"We'd like another round," Quinn tells Dave the bartender. "Put 'em on Santana's tab."

Well, they have accomplished one thing… getting tipsy.

"Coming right up," he says. "Hey, is your friend single?"

"Who? Rachel?" Quinn asks defensively. "She's — taken."

Dave leans in closer. "I was actually talking about your guy friend. Not the one you're avoiding and not the one who looks like a gym rat. The fashionable one."

"Kurt?" Quinn laughs. "Yeah, he's available. You should ask him for his number."

He smiles. "I think I will. No risk, no reward. Right?"

"Right," she says. Normally she's an angry drunk, but whatever Dave the bartender poured her is giving her liquid courage. She feels bold so she pulls Rachel aside. "I have to tell you something," she says, "I lo—"

"Alright, bitches," a slurring Santana interrupts, wrapping an arm around each of their shoulders, "time to get this meeting started."

"Is this how you conduct all your business meetings?" Quinn asks, seething.

"No, we have different vices," Santana says with a wink, leading them over to the rest of the group. "Let's get this over with. Opening statements?"

Sam raises his hand.

"Yeah?" Santana calls on him.

"Shouldn't we wait until Mercedes can be here? I haven't been able to reach her on her phone and—"

"This is an emergency!" Santana says.

Sam swallows. He doesn't want anything to jeopardize his relatively new relationship with his stepdaughter, but he knows he has her best interests at heart. Besides, Mercedes trusted him to bring Aphasia on this trip. He raises his hand again. "Where's the bathroom? I have to pee."

They all decide to take a bathroom break — that way their bladders won't interfere with the meeting. For a few minutes, at least.

"As the only person who's been on Broadway, I'd like to start by saying that the kids need an instructor who is going to push them," Kurt says. "Sue pushed us when we were growing up."

"Yeah, literally pushed us," Santana adds. "She also yanked my earlobes."

"I don't want to subject Harmony to that kind of abuse ever again," Rachel says.

"Roz would never lay a hand on her students," Brittany points out. "She's strict, but fair. She'll make them work, but she won't overwork them."

"I think we can all agree we're not moving to Chicago, Britt," Quinn says. "Right, Rachel?"

"Right," Rachel chimes in.

"Then we should convince her to move to Lima," Brittany shrugs. It's such a simple solution and between her and Santana they have enough money to make it worth Roz's while.

"Text her," Santana suggests.

Brittany gets out her phone and types out a message.

_I got a way u can make lots of $$$$$$._

_Whatever it is, Brittany Susan Pierce, my answer is hellllll no,_ Roz replies moments later.

"She's not interested," Brittany sighs.

"Then I propose we open our own dance studio," Santana says. "Besides, I could use a legit business."

"What does she mean by legit?" Rachel whispers in Quinn's ear.

"She's a crack dealer," Quinn jokes.

Rachel shakes her head. "That explains so much."

Brittany glares at Rachel. "Aren't you a prostitute?" she asks.

Rachel is shocked. "I'm a nurse! Brittany, I was wearing my scrubs when I first saw you this morning."

Brittany shrugs. "So?"

"Can we please get back to my idea?" Santana says. "Sam in all his infinite stripper wisdom can teach pole dancing classes."

"I can?"

"You will," Santana insists. "Kurt can teach a theatre class since he knows about that Broadway bullshit. Quinn, you were better than most of us at ballet."

"What can I do?" Rachel asks.

"Not much. You probably can't even afford a decent portion of the company. Britt and I will own 51%, Kurt 19%, Quinn 19%, Mercedes and Sam 19%, Jesse 7%, and you can have whatever is left."

Rachel does the math in her head. "I don't think there's anything left. That adds up to more than 100."

"Whatever. We'll figure it out later," Santana says. "Meeting adjourned."

Kurt wanders over to the bar where Dave is giving him the eye. "Sam, do you mind if Rory stays in your suite tonight?" he asks.

Sam wraps an arm around a drunk Jesse's waist, helping him stand upright. "Don't worry, Kurt. I got ya," he says to Kurt, who nods in appreciation. Sam takes a step toward the door, struggling a little under Jesse's wait. "When did you get so drunk, bro?"

"The second I realized my wife doesn't love me anymore," Jesse admits.

Sam looks over at Quinn, who is leaning close towards Rachel. "Maybe all she wants is someone to be there for her."

"I don't think that's the case," Jesse says sadly.

"What am I going to do, Quinn? Harmony will know I'm drunk!" Rachel panics. She's never even had a sip of alcohol around her daughter who will definitely know something's amiss.

"Relax," Quinn comforts her, "it'll be okay. Take this key upstairs to room 321 and take a shower. I'll get the girls from Sam's." She doesn't relish the thought of helping Sam take Jesse back to the suite, but it's the least she can do for her estranged husband. After all, he's great with Beth.

"Let me help," Quinn says to Sam, supporting Jesse from the other side.

"Thanks," Sam grunts as they make their way over to the elevator.

Jesse's head bobbles around to face her. "Quinn?"

"I'm here," she says.

Jesse hiccups. "Yeah, but I never was."

"Okay, now's not the time for drunken confessions and apologies," she says, giving Sam a helpless look. The elevator door opens and they drag Jesse inside.

"Who said anything about confessions? Do you have something to confess?" he asks.

"You two can talk about it tomorrow," says Sam, pushing the button for his floor.

"There you are," Santana says once they step off the elevator. She's an impatient woman and she and Brittany have been waiting outside Sam's suite for a few minutes now. They must've caught the first elevator upstairs.

Sam ignores her, takes his key card out of his pocket, and opens the door. He dumps Jesse onto the pullout couch, not even bothering to pull it out since Jesse's already drooling.

Hand in hand, Santana and Brittany open the door to Aphasia's room where they are met with the sweetest sight — all four girls asleep on the bed and Rory curled up on the floor.

"Why is Sugar clutching a stack of hundred dollar bills?" Brittany asks her wife.

"That little thief! She must've snagged it from my purse," Santana says. It's hard to be angry with her when she looks so sweet, however. "C'mon, let's go. We have our room to ourselves."

"Sam, you sure you're okay with all of them sleeping in here?" Quinn asks.

He smiles. "It's fine. Enjoy the rest of your night. I'm going to try calling Mercedes again."

Quinn walks into room 321 just as Rachel is making her way out of the bathroom in just a towel. "They—the girls—were already asleep," she stammers.

"At least we don't have to share beds," Rachel jokes. She tugs at her towel, making sure it's still secure around her body. "Or... we could."

"Pardon?" Quinn coughs.

"I'm just saying... I hate _not_ sharing a bed." Rachel looks at the ground. "Being a single parent is lonely."

Quinn frowns. "Yeah, I'm starting to realize that. Rachel—"

Rachel is quick to cut her off. "I feel like I have this connection with you that I don't with the other parents. You're the only one who actually listens to me when I speak. Please, Quinn. I just need some kind of closeness tonight."

"Okay," Quinn says against her better judgment, "we can share a bed."

* * *

"April, it's that time again."

"Happy hour?" April guesses.

"No," Sandy singsongs. "It's time for the individual competition!"

"And then it's happy hour!" April adds enthusiastically, ignoring the cue cards in favor of her own dialogue.

Sandy smacks his hand to his forehead. "Let's just get this over with."

"Does that guy look familiar to you?" Brittany asks Santana in the audience.

Santana squints, trying to remember. "That's totally the guy we bought weed from when we lived here," she says.

"Righteous," Brittany replies.

"First up in the age 8 to 10 category, we have Little Miss Harrrrrrrrmony!" Sandy steps aside so that Harmony can take the stage, but April remains firmly rooted to her spot.

"Just go around me," she tells Harmony. "I don't trust myself to walk in a straight line and my PO's itchin' to send me back to the slammer."

"This trip keeps getting better and better," Santana laughs as Harmony begins her routine.

"Get off the stage!" Rachel yells.

Harmony gives her mother an incredulous look.

"Not you, honey, that crazy woman!" Rachel clarifies. She leans forward in her seat. "The judges better not take off points for that," she says to Santana. Then she gestures wildly for Harmony to smile.

Brittany rolls her eyes.

"April, why are you on the ground?" Sandy asks as Harmony's performance ends.

"I'm doin' the worm!" April says.

Sandy watches for a moment. "You're not even moving. Oh, now you're just face planting."

"This is what I miss when I'm backstage?" Aphasia asks Sam, thankful she chose not to compete today.

"I guess so," he whispers.

Sandy sighs. "Let's bring on the next contestant." He looks at his note cards. "Everybody, please welcome Little Miss Rory!"

Rory peeks his head from the wings. "I think there's been some mistake," he tells Sandy. "I'm no little miss."

"Hey, who says you can't be?" Sandy says, placing a hand on Rory's shoulder.

Rory contemplates what Sandy just said. "If I dance now, do I have to dance again later when the other boys compete?"

"I won't subject you to that humiliation twice, Tiny Dancer," Sandy says. He points to April. "Now watch out for Speed Bump over there."

Rory takes a deep breath and reminds himself why he's doing this in the first place: his father, who is… Nowhere to be found. "This goes out to my dad," he says before he begins, just in case Kurt is somewhere in the audience.

Santana scans the audience as well. "It's not like Kurt to miss Rory's Irish step dance."

"I know. He's the biggest stage parent of us all," says Brittany. She side eyes Rachel. "Well, second biggest."

Quinn turns around in her seat. "Bet you ten bucks he's still in his hotel room with the bartender."

"Double or nothing he's hungover," Santana wagers. "The boys' individuals don't start until 2. He's probably getting coffee now. I hope Sugar likes hers."

Brittany nods. "Did you make it like she likes it?"

"They ran out of non-dairy creamer so I had to use half-and-half. What was I supposed to do?"

Brittany bites her nails. "She's gonna be so pissed! Now we'll have to buy her more stuff."

"Have you ever tried telling her no?" Quinn asks.

Brittany and Santana shake their heads.

"Maybe you should start."

Rory's performance ends and Sandy claps. "Thank you, Little Mr. Rory! Before you go, can you make sure April still has a pulse?"

April burps in her sleep.

Sandy winces. "Never mind."

"Holy shit," Aphasia says.

"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage… Little Miss Sugar!"

"Ha! What name of a kind is Sugar?" April mumbles into her microphone. Apparently now awake, she manages to sit up. "Either the room is spinnin' or I am."

Sugar barges over to her and pulls a bill out of her costume. "Here's a Benji. Now get the hell off my stage. You're ruining my moment!"

April snatches the money and scrambles off the stage as fast as her tired, weary legs can take her.

"I'm feeling a bit faint myself. Got any more C notes?" Sandy asks.

Sugar wrinkles her nose.

"It was worth a shot," Sandy says. "Right. Once again, please give a round of applause to... Little Miss Sugar!"

The audience cheers wildly, much to Quinn's surprise. Little does she know that Santana paid a few dozen people to give Sugar some encouragement.

In the wings, Roz Washington laughs at the lengths Santana and Brittany go to just to make their daughter happy.

* * *

**A/N: Only two more chapters left!**


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